House Guest
by Puppy- Angel of Ice
Summary: What happens when you mix a rap obsessed Tristan and his friend with a very serious Seto Kaiba? A comedy based strictly on Tristan Taylor. Pairings known:YugixYami, RyouxBakura...the rest are still unknown to me. I'm not pairing Tristan with anyone.
1. Searching, running, entering

Aoi: Yes, another comedy by me. YAY! I was so inspired to start writing this fanfic while I was finishing up my Tea bashing one. But I'm just going to get one thing straight. This is NOT a TristanxSeto story. In my stories I tend to make Tristan the only Yu-Gi-Oh! guy who isn't gay. XDD

Disclaimer: I do **NOT** own Yu-Gi-Oh, I wish I did...but I don't. -sniffle- I do **NOT **own the name Gorillaz for a group. I do **NOT **own "Gold digger" by Kanye West. I do **NOT **own "In da club" by 50 cent. I do **NOT** own "Jesus Walks"Kanye West. I do **NOT** own "We be burnin'" by Sean Paul. I do **NOT** own "Kryptonite (I'm on it)" by Big Boi & Purple Ribbon All-Stars. I do NOT own "Spongebob". **BUT I DO OWN THE IDEA OF TRISTAN'S FAMILY, MY MADE-UP CHARACTER, CHRIS... AND THIS STORY. SO I WOULD HIGHLY APPRECIATE IT IF YOU DIDN'T TRY TO STEAL MY IDEA. THAT WOULD MAKE ME REALLY SAD AND PISSED OFF AT THE SAME TIME. I'M SORRY BUT IT'S TRUE**...thank you.

* * *

House Guest 

Chapter One:Searching, Running, Entering.

* * *

_Ding Dong,_ sounded the door bell after the finger released from it. A cheerful smile upon the face of our favorite brunette, Tristan Taylor. It was a lovely June day, school being let out. The earth still being dampened from rain the night before, oh yes, to him this was a lovely day. At the sides of him there were bags of luggage, why? And why he was at Seto Kaiba's front door? These questions will seriously be answered soon enough.

* * *

Earlier that day, okay...last night to be exact. Tristan stared out the window, his chestnut colored eyes three times their original size, as the car drove away in the rainy darkness. "We'll trust you to find someone," his mother had said to him before she and his father left for a vacation. Right...he needed someone to stay with, but why bother people in the night when you have tomorrow? The teen decided to put it off till the next day when he'd be fully restored, and it would be easy to find a friend to stay with. After all, who could say no to him?

* * *

The next day, the teen walked through the door of the Game Shop. The bell dinging at the moment the door opened. The brunette looking very cheerful as he walked over to counter to see someone behind an opened news paper. Of course it was grandpa, he figured. "Hey Grandpa...you gotta sec?" 

"Sorry Tristan, I'm very busy," the ancient, old man answered as he lowered his news paper, a smile upon his face.

Tristan about died at the sight of the old one, he must've gotten older since the last time he had seen him.

"Oh don't mind me, I'm not a morning person," the old man used as an excuse.

The teen simply nodding, he understood that some people weren't morning people, after all...neither was dad, but that was another story. Yugi's grandfather got up from his stool, and walked towards him. It obvious that age was getting to him since his vision wasn't all that good, his arms reaching for the body of the other.

"**STAY BACK, OLD ONE,"** he proclaimed holding his fingers in the shape of a cross as he backed out of the game shop.

"Okay, come again," Grandpa answered, waving towards the dinging door.

* * *

"Who was that Grandpa?" Yugi suddenly asked as he walked through the door, his clothes rather ruffled, red marks on his skin. It was obvious what he had done the night before, and this morning...but because of his grandfather's bad hearing, short memory, and horrible eye sight...he could get away with anything. 

"Who was who?" he answered reaching for a broom. Sometimes Grandpa would get in these moods...where he just had to clean something, even though it wasn't dirty at all. Usually he would pick the floor, since it was the easiest thing to find. And deep down inside he always thought it was dirty...and the fact that Yugi paid to get black colored tile to replace the old ones that were beginning to chip away, wasn't helping. And while he was at it, he got the whole entire place modernize, there was no need for people to look at the game shop and be able to guess that the store was being ran by an elderly man.

"The person who just came by," The eighteen year old explained.

"Oh no, I'm missing In the heat of the night, episode 4809, Yugi," he dropping his broom, shaking his grandson by the shoulders, "**EPISODE 4809!**"

"I get it Grandpa, I get it."

"No, Yugi...I don't think you do," he answered, his hands moving away from his grandson, "You don't understand anything...all you care about is those new fangled heart attack shows, with all the noise, and noise, and noise. The beeping and screaming and cursing and blood and sex and drugs and violence."

"You can't forget the action," Yugi added.

"**WHAT ACTION!**" he exclaimed, "What? People having sex on televison? Is that action? Those music videos showin' too much booty, not leaving any room for imagination."

"Right Grandpa," the tri-color haired teen awkwardly chuckled, "Aren't you missing your show?"

"**NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO,"** the elderly old man dramatically cried as he dropped to his knees.

* * *

Tristan lightly kicked a tiny rock as he walked down the dampened sidewalk. He needed a sign, a sign from god of where he was supposed to go next. That's when he noticed a tiny sheet of paper gently floating in the wind with all it's majesty, oh he needed it, he needed it more than anything...so he chased it. There was nothing wrong with the eighteen year old chasing the floating object which happened to be caught in an updraft, drifting farther and farther from him.

* * *

It kept floating until it finally landed on top the stoop of an old apartment building, the brunette running over to pick it up. Instead of reading it, he folded it neatly, and stuffed it into his pocket, patting it lightly afterwards. 

So where exactly was he? Well, looking around he noticed that he was in a bad part of town...well that was what someone had tagged on the side of a building in a rather artistic fashion. Even the sign below it that said **LEAVE OR DIE**, looked very inviting to the teen.

* * *

"You live 'round here?" a voice suddenly asked, the voice of a local Tristan figured, he whipping around to see a man with a rather dark complexion...he was black in simplier terms. 

"Uh...hmm...yes?"

"You live in dat buildin'?

"No...I'm sorry, I lied to you," he quickly apologized.

"T'aint right...you can't be lyin' folk, dumb shit" the other snapped.

"I apologize Mr...erm, what am I supposed to call you again?"

"Chris," he answered, managing to give a smile exposing one of his gold teeth.

"As in Christopher?"

"Man, you can't be callin' me by my first name like you's my mama," the male hissed as in a quick motion he had a gun up to Tristan's neck. Tristan didn't know how he got himself into situations like this...but it seemed as if it came natural to him. A straight face was the only emotion the brunette had. Chris noticed this as he removed his gun, lightly chuckling at the fact that the other wasn't crying or wetting his pants. He then lightly punching Tristan's arm.

"Man, you okay for a white boy," he laughed, "maybe we should hang out sometime or somethin'."

"Am I supposed to be offended?" Tristan asked as his brow arched slightly.

"No man, I'm complementin' you," he laughed even harder. "Well see ya sometime." And with that Chris walked off.

* * *

The feeling that was left inside of the other was sheer confusion, and bafflement, no matter, he had to go inside of the apartment building to see who he just remembered lived here. Joey Wheeler of course. But how was he going to get inside was the question, he had to be tactful.

* * *

Joey suddenly walked past him, inside of the building as he thought to himself. After a few seconds, the blonde poked his head out, only to make sure that he was really seeing who he thought he saw. 

"Tristan?"

"Shh, shh white boy, I'm figuring out a way to be tactful," he commented.

"White...boy? Tristan, you sure you got ya head on straight?" the other eighteen year old asked as he lightly scratched his head, "Well, you comin' inside?"

The other only shrugged his shoulders as he followed.

* * *

Once inside Joey's actual apartment, Tristan took a seat on the old couch. It took him a while to get comfortable...but after a few minutes of alternating positions he was able to. Joey on the other hand, was trying his best to straighten up, picking up his father's beer bottles, which happened to be scattered about the place. Some not even empty, but the brunette was one of the few people that were actually allowed to see the place like this. To Joey...Tristan was like the brother he's glad he doesn't have...or something along the lines of that. 

As old beer was being poured down the sink, Tristan suddenly remembered that he had a duffle bag and a rolling suit case with him. He quickly unzipping one of the pockets, pulling out a cd case. "Hey Joe, my dad got me another CD to give to you," he said as he held up the item, waving it slightly, "You know, since my dad works with the music people."

"Uh huh," the blonde commented from the other room.

"Yeah, I thought you would like Gorillaz or something," the brunette added, he knowing in his heart how kind and caring he was. Of course he was the perfect friend, more perfect than that Tea Gardner of course. It was all about sex to her, that's all she ever talked about. Besides, if he continued giving Joey CD's then there was a slight chance that he would forget about all the insults that he had given him in the past. Like the times he called him a monkey, an awful duelist or even a dueling monkey...the truth was that he didn't really mean it. And maybe, just maybe this could be an opportunity for bygones be bygones.

Joey suddenly walked out of the kitchen, he wiping his hands off on a towel as he glanced about the room. He being quite pleased at the way everything looked. The place actually looked decent, now to see how long it stayed that way. After taking the cd from his friend, he walked through another door, it being the one to his bed room.

"Joey," Tristan began, his voice trying to sound as innocent as possible.

"Ya need something?" he called out.

"Yeah, I kinda do...see, I need a place to stay for a while, and I was wondering if I could stay with you, ol' buddy, ol' pal."

"Sorry, Tristan," the blonde said as he walked out of the bedroom, back into the living room, "I'm gonna be stayin' at my mom's." He cringing at the word. It was a well known fact that Joey Wheeler was never on good terms with his mother. To the point where he was surprised that he actually was getting to stay in her house...but it seemed his little sister might've had something to do with that. Another reason he actually agreed to stay there for a while, other than the fact that he wanted to see Serenity, was because his father was going to be having a lot of his friends over...and Joey frankly didn't want to be here to see a lot of drunken, old men act stupid.

The brunette simply stood up at this, he nodding his head to his friend. It was a shame he wasn't going to be able to stay with the Wheelers. He actually thought that Joey's dad was cool. Sure he was drunk, but he would let you do about almost anything if he wasn't trying to beat you up.

"Hope ya find someone to stay with," the other grinned as he pulled up the blinds, making it easier for him to look down at the street below. All he had to do was wait for his mom to pull up.

"Well, good luck, buddy," Tristan laughed, giving his friend a thumbs up as he started walking towards the door.

A few minutes after he actually walked out of it, he walked back in. "Hey Joey."

"Yeah?"

"Do you know someone named...Chris?"

"Uh, I guess...I know he lives around here."

"Well, yeah...we're friends, and I think we should all hang out sometime."

"Oh...kay."

"Yeah, that's all I wanted to tell you," and with that, he was gone again.

* * *

As Tristan Taylor walked down the sidewalk he couldn't help but get very bored, sure listening to the sounds of cars passing by and dogs barking at you was pretty amazing...but it just wasn't enough. So he pulled out his ipod, placing the headphones in his ears, quickly flipping through the songs he had up there. Unlike a lot of his friends, he had a fascination for rap, gangster rap and r&b. It might've had something to do with the fact that his dad worked with rappers and such from America, or it was simply because he just liked the way it sounded...the world may never know. 

Once the song actually started up Tristan started humming to himself, the eighteen year old couldn't help but tap his finger along with the beat as well. Finally he couldn't resist the urge no longer, he just had to sing along. It was his all time favorite song, Gold Digger by Kanye West.

"I know his dude's ballin but yea thats nice, And they gone keep callin and tryin," he started to rap lightly to himself, "But you stay right girl, But when you get on he leave yo ... for a white girl."

* * *

It was weird, the first time he ever heard this song was one time it played on his mom's car radio. But right when she moved her hand to change it, he whined lightly, "Mom...I wanna hear it." "Okay, Tristan, mommy's going to let it play," he had smiled to him in a motherly way before returning her glance to the road.

* * *

Up ahead, the house that he happened to be walking to could be seen. The home of Tea Gardner, how he really didn't want to talk to her. The truth was that he just ran out of things to say to that woman.

* * *

A deep sigh sounded from the brunette as he knocked upon the door of the two storied house of the other brunette. She opening the door moments later, looking around. 

"Hmm, I thought someone was at my door," she lightly said.

"I'm standing right here," he flatly answered.

"Hmm, It's like the wind is trying to talk to me."

"I'm seriously right here," he answered, getting more and more annoyed by the second.

"Oh wait...it's just Tristan," she finally acknowledged.

There was a moment of silence between the two. It obvious that the two just didn't have anything to say to each other. Tea didn't like Tristan, and he didn't like her...if you didn't know that then people would be asking where you were over the last few years of high school.

"Well, I guess I should be going," he finally said, wanting the silence to end.

"I think you should," she agreed before slamming the door.

* * *

As he walked farther and farther from her house, the male couldn't help but thank god. After all there was no way he was going to survive staying at her house. Besides, what on earth were they going to talk about? Sex with guys? Tristan's not gay! And that's the lifestyle he's sticking with. 

Next friend on the list, was indeed Ryou. But before going there Tristan had to take the time to think. Did he really want to put himself in that position? He could just see it now, the whole night he would be watching Ryou's collection of Disney movies, and then that night he would have to listen to him and his yami make love...or at least that's what Ryou called it. He didn't want to listen to that...but he'd rather listen to that than go to Malik's house. Those Egyptians were insane. The two of them are seriously evil. The yami wanting to hump anything that moved while the hikari would watch, wondering whether or not to join or not.

Okay that marked the six of them off the list, yes six, since Ishizu and Odion lived with both Marik and Malik. They were the Ishtars after all.

* * *

Who else could he ask? And that's where we are now. Tristan ringing the door bell to Seto Kaiba's mansion. The door finally opening, he seeing the butler. Tristan looking up at him, giving a friendly smile. 

"Hey, can I speak to Kaiba?" he asked.

"Do you have an appointment?"

"Yes?"

"Then you may come in," the butler smiled as he let the brunette inside. The teen taking his luggage in with him. For a moment he was in aw at the size of the place. "Man, Joey wasn't kidding," he said to himself, thinking back to the many times his pal described sneaking it to prank Seto in the night...unfortunately every time he went he, meaning Tristan Taylor, was busy hanging out with his family.

The CEO of Kaiba corp just happened to be walking down the stairs to see the other inside of his home, he blinking slightly...confused. How on earth did he get past his butler! This beginning to anger him, his brows narrowing to the other. He mouthing several curse words as he walked slightly faster down the steps.

"What the hell are _you _doing in here!" Seto quickly snapped.

"Came by to ask if I could stay with you for a few weeks," he answered, "So can I stay with you for a few weeks?"

"You know what," he began, his glance coming off the teen, there was no reason for him to actually waste his time with him, "No...and I'm giving you to the count of three to get out, before I release the hounds on you."

"Yipe," Tristan squeaked as he quickly got out of the home.

* * *

"Well, I'm back where I started," he said as he hopped to the sounds of In Da Club, that played through the headphones of his Ipod.

* * *

It was now 8:00pm, and he still had no idea of where he was supposed to stay. He even stopped at burger world, to get a bite as he pondered to himself. Of course he kept his bags close to him, especially since he kept noticing an old man who had his eyes on it. Tristan kept his cd's in his bags, and it was obvious that the old man wanted them. The brunette couldn't explain it but there was something about old people that just made him a tad bit paranoid. 

The moment he bit into his hamburger, the man went and joined him at his table...this really creeping him out. His eyes never leaving the other. The elderly man's eyes were small and beady like, their gaze never leaving him. While the man's skin was wrinkly, like that of a bull dog. His skin complexion was a bit like Tristan's, however not as light, maybe three ticks darker. On his head he wore a head scarf, it being covered in a rainbow. His eye brows were bushy snow colored, the teen guessing that the hair was probably the same. His attire was that of a white tight t-shirt that read off: "Old Nasty", it being tight enough to show his fatty wrinkles. Oh god, Tristan was afraid. What if the old man's eyes weren't on his bags...what if they were on him!

Sure Tristan loved gay people, all of his friends belonged to that community, but the fact that an old man...note old, old, old. (Remember...Tristan has a problem with elderly people...very important to remember). A slight whimper sounded from him as he quickly squeaked, "Check please!"

* * *

Back on the sidewalk, still uncomfortable about the situation he had just escaped. He needed to get shelter soon enough, anywhere...but where? "**LORD, GIVE ME A SIGN!**" He cried out, "**FOR JESUS WALKS WITH ME, WITH ME, WITH ME.**" And that's when he saw it, Duke's game shop. Maybe this was his sign...but why Duke? Duke of all people? It started to rain. Tristan quickly putting his Ipod and headphones in his waterproof duffle bag. "I'm sorry God, I didn't mean to complain," he cried out...moments later the rain stopped.

* * *

The moment Tristan walked through the door, he couldn't help but look around at his surroundings. Posters were up advertising _Dungeon Dice Monsters_, even off to the side there was all the official merchandise. The brunette was quite impressed, maybe it wasn't going to be _that_ bad staying with the one who was also after his love, Serenity of course. 

Lightly he rolled his backpack around, holding onto his duffle bag as he walked over to the counter, glancing around not seeing anyone. This was...weird, since the shop wasn't considered close yet. But then again there was a note on the register counter that said: "Be back in a few". The male wanted really badly to find Duke to find off he could stay, it was already past 9:30pm. He was wasting entirely too much time.

The only thing he could think of doing was look for the raven haired teen, and that's what he did. Walking about the game shop, accidentally wandering into a dark hallway. "I don't remember ever getting a tour of this place," he commented as he couldn't help but wander in farther. Sounds could suddenly be heard. This really catching the brunette's attention, he wanted to see what was going on. The sounds were getting louder as he progressed down the hall. He able to see a door at the end which had a light shining underneath it. The sounds sounding more like moans, groans and laughs. This creeping him out more and more by the second as his hand moved to the knob. Everything inside of him was telling him to just back away...but curiosity had a spell on him it seemed.

In a quick motion he barged through the door, and to his horror he saw Duke Devlin and another man. He being completely scared, however acted like a deer caught in the headlights. Meaning he couldn't move at all. Both of the men looked over at the intruder. The raven haired male cowering behind his partner, he being a brunette like Tristan, with the addition of blonde spiked up tips. His dark colored eyes looked angered at the other teen as he felt Duke's presence moving behind him. What angered him most of all was that he wasn't ready to stop giving affection to his raven haired lover.

"I'll be going now," our star awkwardly chuckled as he thumbed the direction the door was in, before retreating.

* * *

"I hope you know you can stay with us as long as you need to," Yugi smiled as he watched Atemu stash Tristan's luggage into the closet. The pharaoh didn't look happy, there was no way he wanted any visitors at the moment. The brunette nodded, looking a bit uneasy at the room, he one bed. 

"Uh, Yugi," he began, "Didn't the pharaoh used to have his own bed?"

"Yeah, but we got rid of it," the tri-haired hikari explained, "He didn't use it anyways."

His yami shooting him a playful grin at the statement, this only causing the other to blush heavily.

"Right," Tristan answered, drawing out his word, as he glanced away from the bed back to Yugi, "Then where am I going to sleep?"

"With Grandpa," Yugi simply answered. He not really seeing a problem with it, but decided to quickly add, "He snores...loudly."

"Not like we hear it though," Atemu chuckled.

The brunette only stared at the other eighteen year old and his yami. He really didn't want to know all of this, but then it hit him...he was going to have to stay in the same bed as Grandpa. An old man! If Tristan were physically mutate with the abilities of a dog...then he'd have his tail in between his legs right now.

* * *

Later that night, after he had been kicked out of the tri-colored haired males room, he slowly shuffled down the hall towards the room of their elder. He hearing slight laughter from the closed door that was behind him. It bringing a slight whimper from him. Sure he didn't want to hear that, but he would rather be under their bed than in the same bed as an old man. 

"We be burnin' not concernin' what nobody wanna say...We be earnin' dollars turning 'cause we mind de pon we pay...More than gold and oil and diamonds - girls, we need dem everyday...Recognize it, we pimpin' as we riding," he lightly sang to himself, yes...at the moment he had _We be burnin'_ stuck in his head.

Slowly he walked inside the dark room, the sound of snoring could be heard, it was enough to send chills up his spine. He didn't want to do this...no one could make him do this.

* * *

The next thing he knew he was back in Seto Kaiba's mansion, his bed room to be exact. He having his bags with him of course. They were his gold after all. Before he could poke him he saw the twenty year old's mouth open to say something. Because Tristan's mother was a reporter, he learned at a young age that it is foolish to leave the house with out a tape recorder or video camera of some sort. So he whipped out his tape recorder, placing it close to the other's lips. Seto was indeed mumbling things...incriminating things...things that could ruin his reputation for the rest of his life and even in death. They were indeed, that bad. 

"Hey Kaiba...do you mind if I stay here for a few weeks or something like that?" he quietly whispered to the sleeping male.

"Yeah, sure...whatever," he yawned as he turned over in his sleep, snuggling close to his pillow...trying to get comfortable.

This completely shocked Tristan, not the fact that he could stay, but the fact that Kaiba was actually sleeping like a person. He always secretly thought that he was a robot...yes a robot.

"Oh thanks," he smiled as he crawled in the bed with the other, "Hey Kaiba...um...could you move over alittle?"

"Sure," he said rather muffled like as he sleepily moved over so that Tristan could get comfortable.

"Hey Kaiba...could you get me a glass of water while you're at it?"

"Whatever," Seto answered as he sat up, hopping out of the bed, still asleep. Once he left the room, Tristan took his pillow, flipping it over to the other side. The cool side of the pillow. The CEO returned shortly with the glass of water, handing it to his "guest" before getting back in his spot, he not having a pillow to rest his head on. But he was so tired he didn't even notice.

"Yeah, I love sleep overs, Kaiba, don'tchu?"

"Mmhmm."

"Well, good night, Kaiba."

"Yeah...good night, Tristan."

After a few seconds Seto's eyes snapped open, he looking over at the other male sleeping beside him. He immediately kicking him out of the bed, Tristan's face hitting the hard wood floor with a thud.

"I be on it all night, man I be on it," Tristan rapped in a robotic like voice as he poked his head up, "All day straight up pimp...If you want me you can find me in da-"

"What the hell?" The other asked, he being caught off guard by the song, however soon remembered what he was about the say.

"Why are you in my house!" he growled, as he hopped out of his bed, switching on the light switch.

"Now Kaiba," Tristan began as he stood up, "Before you say anything-"

"**GET OUT!**"

The eighteen year old suddenly held up the tape recorder, pressing play. It was Seto Kaiba's voice saying,_ "Oh yeah, the things I want to do to him...I want to...to fu-"_ He pressing stop before the actual word was said.

"Yeah, Kaiba there's more," he smirked, "Now...you're going to let me stay here, and you're going to treat me like a guest, or my mom's company is going to get this tape."

"You're evil," the CEO hissed.

"What? My mom is a reporter, what do you expect?"

"Whatever...just get out of my room," Seto finally sighed, realizing that there was nothing he could really do at the moment. He had to figure out a plan though, there was _no_ way he was going to be living with him, even if it were only for weeks. "Besides...there are plenty of other rooms in this place."

"Thanks Kaiba," he laughed as he walked out of the room with his bags, but had stuffed the tape recorder in his duffle bag before doing so.

Seto Kaiba couldn't help but slam the door behind Tristan Taylor. Hell was written all over this whole situation...and he knew that his summer wasn't going to be a good one.

* * *

Aoi: Okay people, I couldn't help but have a small parody to a Spongebob episode I saw. But anyways, tell me what you people think so far. Oh yeah, and please no flames. 


	2. Breaking in the house

Aoi: Oh god, I'm seriously insane from writing this story. But anyways, I'm just warning you again that this story has some sexual humor. Another point I need to make is that there are a few parodies in this Chapter. And many thanks to my readers for actually taking the time to read this story.

Disclaimer: I do **NOT** own _"Yu-Gi-Oh!"_. I do **NOT** own _"Cat Woman"_. I do **NOT** own _"Spider-man"_. I do **NOT** own _"Dodgeball: The story of a true underdog"_.I do **NOT** own _"Austin Powers: The spy who shagged me"_. I do **NOT** own _"Run it" _by Chris Brown". I do **NOT** own_ "Real BIG" _by Mannie Fresh. I do **NOT** own _"the Remix to Ignition" _by R. Kelly. I do **NOT** own _"What's your fantasy" _by Ludacris. **BUT I DO OWN CHRIS, TRISTAN'S GOOD FRIEND. I DO OWN THE IDEA OF TRISTAN'S FAMILY. I DO OWN THE IDEA OF THIS STORY, I WOULD HIGHLY APPRECIATE IT IF YOU DIDN'T TRY TO RIP ME OFF. IF YOU LIKE SOMETHING YOU SEE...PLEASE ASK FOR PERMISSION TO USE IT AND BE SURE TO GIVE ME CREDIT.** Thank you.

* * *

House Guest

Chapter Two: Breaking in the house

* * *

"Okay...Check it, Check it, Check it out. It's Santana again," was whispered in Seto's ear as he slept, "Steppin, Steppin, Steppin out...One of them Brand new big boy toys." This causing the young adult to turn over his sleep, flicking his ear slightly to get rid of the annoyance. "I do big boy things, I make big boy noise cuz...I know what girls want..." This caused his eyes to snap open, he quickly turning over to see Tristan staring at him.

"What the fu-"

"Finally you're up, Kaiba," The other brunette interrupted, "Now get out of bed!"

"Why should I," the CEO sleepily whined, as he pulled the blanket over his head, his view on the clock. Then it hit him...this wasn't Mokuba he was talking to, this was **TRISTAN TAYLOR**. So the night before hadn't just been a bad dream. This guy was seriously staying with him, a horrified expression began to slip upon the face of the cowering brunette.

"Come on, Seto," Mokuba said as he peaked under the blanket at his big brother. The raven haired, thirteen year old had already been up many hours with Tristan. They having enough time to plot.

"Mokuba...you've got to do me a favor," he whispered, trying to keep his voice low enough so that his "house guest" wouldn't hear him.

"Huh?"

"I need you to find his tape recorder...it has something on it, that I can't risk getting out to the media."

"How bad could it actually be?"

"Trust me...it's bad."

"Fine, I'll keep an eye out for it, but anyways...we're going out."

"You and _Tristan_!"

"No! He's not gay...and I didn't mean like that anyways. Seriously Seto, you need to get this whole homo thing out of your system. But seriously we need to go to Kaiba corp."

This caused the older Kaiba to sit up, staring at his younger brother in disbelief. Was he actually saying what he thought he was saying? He was surprised he hadn't been begged to go somewhere more summer like. Hiking, fishing or swimming were only a few of the things that popped in the CEO's mind that the raven haired teen could've suggested.

"Are you feeling alright, Mokuba?"

"Never been better," Mokuba grinned, "Now get dressed."

* * *

While the two brothers had been talking to each other, Tristan had made his way over to Kaiba's closet, the doors flinging wide open to reveal the taller brunette's wardrobe. The next following seconds were probably filled with silence from him. He was speechless. What could he say?

* * *

Once the Kaiba brothers left the house, Seto believing it wasn't a good idea to leave their home alone with Tristan, the other brunette slammed the door behind them. For a moment, he had no idea of what to do. He had the whole place to himself, everything was going according to plan. In a quick motion he whipped out his list of things he'd always wanted to do inside of The Kaiba Manor. The number one thing up there was to break out in song dressed like a rich snob. "Now where on earth am I supposed to find snobby rich clothes?" There was no way he was going to shove himself into Seto's leather...he honestly didn't know why a person would even bother.

* * *

Moments later, Chris arrived, he staring at the size of the house. Tristan simply laughed as the two started running about the house, simply because they could do whatever they wanted...since it was up to them to keep an eye on the house. The first thing the brunette decided to do was let all of the servants go home...they didn't need to be here anyways, it wasn't like they were going to tear up the place.

* * *

"House real-BIG," Chris shouted down to Tristan from the top of the stairs.

"Cars real-BIG," the other shouted back from a door way that lead to where Seto had kept his most prized cars.

"Belly real-BIG" was shouted from the guest of the guest, who just happened to now be in the kitchen staring in the refrigerator.

"Everything real-BIG..."

* * *

When Seto and Mokuba finally returned home from work, they walked inside of the manor only to be completely shocked. What they saw caught them off guard on so many levels. Everything looked so...different. To the point it didn't even look like their home anymore, but more like the home of celebrity or someone along the lines of that. And not just any type of celebrity, but a gangster rapper. It was...different for the two Kaiba brothers.

"**HEY KAIBA!**" shouted down both the guests from at the top of the staircase, this causing their glance to be shifted towards the two. Mokuba's eyes had never been wider, sure he knew that Tristan was going to fix up the place...but like this?

"I see you were busy," the raven haired teen joked lightly as he started up towards the two. Once he actually facing the two, he tilted his head slightly at Chris. "So this is your friend? Chris is it," he asked as he held out his hand to the other, "I'm Mokuba Kaiba."

Tristan's friend only nodded as he shook the hand of the younger Kaiba, however he couldn't help but glance towards Seto. A few snickers sounding from him. This puzzled the younger brother greatly, he didn't understand what was so funny.

"Leather," the other brunette whispered to one of his hosts, "Chris didn't believe me when I told him that he wore leather."

"Wait, he doesn't know who Seto is...doesn't he watch TV? Doesn't he know about duels!"

"Never really cared," Chris simply answered, "It's all 'bout the races. Ya know the ones that technically aren't supposed to exist." A grin was left upon the face of the new friend.

"Wait...you mean the ones that are," Mokuba began, however quickly hushed himself to look around, before finally finishing, "Illegal? Drag races? Street races? Is that what you're talking about!"

Tristan and Chris were left speechless, the two actually looking frightened. "**WHO TOLD YOU!**" The brunette suddenly exclaimed.

"Isn't that what you were talking about?"

That question was followed by silence, the two didn't want Mokuba knowing about the races...even though they sort of already did. But they weren't going to admit, no...there was no way they were going to do that.

"Well I won't see you later," Tristan winked.

"Don'tchu wink at me," Chris snapped as he whacked the other upside his head, before leaving.

This whole thing left the younger Kaiba strangely suspicious. _'What the hell where they talking about?'_ he couldn't help but think to himself, as he watched Tristan retreat to his room. One thing was obvious...something was going to end up happening tonight, and he had to be there to see it.

* * *

"Seto," the younger Kaiba whined as he sat upon the bed of his older brother, watching him get dressed for bed, "They're planning something...I swear!"

"Sure Mokuba," he smirked as he pulled down his shirt into place, a slight yawn sounding from him.

"Doesn't this bother you?"

"Not really."

"Don't you want to find out what they're up to!"

Seto stared at his younger brother for a moment, moving towards him to ruffle his hair, "Did you ever think that you're just over reacting. Seriously Mokuba, there's no way that those two losers are in something as big as street racing. Besides, where are they going to get a car?"

"I dunno," the other replied as he sheepishly stared down at his hands, "Maybe you're right. I guess I just thought for once that things were really as they seemed."

* * *

In one of the guest rooms, Tristan stared at the clock, he was too excited. He simply couldn't wait. The eighteen year old had been trembling from excitement. It was all too unbearable, he just wanted to make time tick by faster...but unfortunately he hadn't learned to do that yet. Mokuba hadn't been wrong, he and Chris were planning to go to a street race, well...his friend was going to be in one. When the two were "improving" the house he had been telling him about the sport, and how you can win big money at the end...and how exciting it was. The only problem was that you had to bet your car, and one thing his friend didn't want to do was bet his own...that's where Tristan came in. His job was to take on of Seto's many cars, and bring it down to the track as proof they had it.

* * *

"Well, if you're not worried then I'm not worried," Mokuba grinned as he hugged his brother's body tightly, "Don't you like the way the house looks, Seto?"

"Not really," he flatly stated, "I don't even feel like it's my house...it makes me a bit uncomfortable."

"But could you end up liking it?"

"I don't think so."

"Oh...well, I'm sorry," the younger brother sighed, before leaving the room.

* * *

As the raven haired teen walked down the hall he couldn't help but scurry over to Tristan's door, he wanted to see for himself that it was nothing. Carefully he cracked it open to see that the house guest had already gone to sleep. _'Maybe he was right about Tristan.'_ So he shut the door and started walking towards his own bed room, before it actually hit him. There was something odd about the position Tristan had been sleeping in. In a dash he was back to the room, this time he actually going inside...making his way to the bed even.

Quietly he counted to three in his head before whipping the covers off of...Tristan. At that moment Mokuba Kaiba never felt so foolish...but, but there was no way that the person in the bed now was actually the same thing that was in the bed a few minutes ago...no way at all.

"No Mokuba, it's too cold," the brunette whined as he started whacking the younger Kaiba with his pillow.

"Gah, quit it," the other commanded as he dropped the covers so he'd be able to shield his face from the on coming pillow. "Tristan, I'm serious...stop it!"

"Get out, white boy," he suddenly commented as he snatched up the covers.

"White...boy? Whatever," the other huffed angrily before leaving the room. He didn't know how Tristan did it...but somehow he was one step ahead of him.

* * *

_What actually happened to Tristan between the time that Mokuba left Seto's room and ripped the covers off of him:_

_Tristan had been so excited about going to the race that he had decided to just get dressed to go. But then he remembered the way Mokuba had been looking at him and Chris. He had those eyes...those eyes that just begged you to bring them with you. Oh how he couldn't resist those eyes...but deep down inside he knew that they couldn't bring the younger Kaiba. It angered him slightly that he would start to remember that small part of the day, but he couldn't let that get him down. NO, he had to stay excited._

_Once he was actually dressed and ready to go, a tiny thought popped in his head. What if Mokuba came by to check up on him...since it was completely obvious he had wanted to attend from the start. That spelled out trouble in so many ways. It was up to Tristan to fool the thirteen year old...but how? With the oldest trick in the book of course. The ol' pillows under the blanket routine. _

_Right at the moment his door had been cracked open the first time, the brunette had been stooped down at the other side of the bed...the side farthest from the door. He holding in his laughter as the door had suddenly shut. Everything had been going according to plan. Now to carry out the last phase. So as quickly and quietly as he could he fixed his pillows, and pulled his night clothes over his other clothes. Ruffling up his hair even to make it look as if it had been messed up from sleeping of course. Then he positioned himself under the covers in the same manner that the pillows had been in. What a clever plan he had, and to think he came up with this whole thing just by remembering Mokuba's eyes. The way they kept staring at him. _

_The next step he had to carry out...was the sleeping step. He had to be completely quiet, slowing down his breathing even to make it seem more believable that he had been sleeping. It was only a matter of seconds till the other Kaiba was expected to come through the door. Once his eye lids finally relaxed to the point it didn't look like he was faking, the younger Kaiba snuck into the room. He just listened slightly to the sounds of the intruder's footsteps as they neared his bed. It was just taking all the strength inside of him to keep from laughing. Then the covers were whipped off, the brunette knew he was supposed to curl up from the cold. But then he remembered something, he was only wearing his night clothes over his other clothes...so it might've looked weird if Mokuba actually took the time to look him over. So he quickly picked up his pillow to whack the other out of the room, before he noticed anything incriminating. _

_However the intruder didn't leave_, _but Tristan already suspected that this would happen. After all who actually leaves because someone whacks them. He could only think of a hand full of people...but one things for sure, Mokuba wasn't on that list. So he decided to add something else. Confusion. At the moment the covers were dropped, he had quickly snatched them up. His first mission was complete...to keep the other from noticing his clothes. But how to confuse him. He had to think back for this. In these few seconds Tristan Taylor had a flash back. _

_Flash back_

_Joey suddenly walked past him, inside of the building as he thought to himself. After a few seconds, the blonde poked his head out._

"_Tristan?"_

"_Shh, shh white boy, I'm figuring out a way to be tactful," Tristan had explained._

"_White...boy? Tristan, you sure you got ya head on straight?" the other eighteen year old asked as he lightly scratched his head, "Well, you comin' inside?"_

_End flash back_

_For some strange reason, him calling people 'white boy' confused them...leaving them utterly speechless. It was just the thing he needed, but he had to add to it. He had to add an action...to trick his mind into completing. It was weird, it seemed if you insulted someone with a name they really didn't understand and didn't add an action to it...they would just stand there and stare...or try to beat you up. But if you added an action, there was a high chance that they would complete it. _(I am not suggesting that anyone try this...I am simply making this whole crazy thing up as I go.)_ That being the reason Tristan added "Get out". The moment he said those words...he quickly added the phrase of confusion that he had learned from his friend Chris. It seemed he learned a lot of things from him over the few hours he had spent with him. He even learned words he wasn't aloud to say, and which ones he could. To Tristan...Chris was very wise, he was like a Budah, Yoda...or someone like that. _

_After this plan had been completed, he waited for the younger Kaiba to leave angrily. Oh yes, he was so smart. Another thing Chris had taught him was to stay one step ahead of your opponent...and that's what he did today._

_

* * *

_

The brunette quickly hopped out of his bed so that he could shut the door behind the Kaiba. He couldn't believe his plan actually worked, it was amazing. There was no way he could ever explain to his friends what he did a few seconds ago...he figured they wouldn't have been able to follow. After giving it some thought, he didn't think his friends really thought of him as being smart, except for Joey. It was as if Joey and Chris were the only ones who truly understood him. Moments like these made him wish that his blonde friend wasn't out of town, he knew that he would've enjoyed staying in Kaiba's house more than him. Tristan always wanted to see Joey's skills at tormenting Seto up close...and now was the perfect time for him to.

After giving all of this thought, he simply shrugged it off, that's life. In a quick motion he snatched off his night clothes, revealing the clothes he had put on earlier. It was almost time. He just had one more task to complete.

* * *

Quietly the male poked his head out of his room, looking down the halls...trying to catch sight of anyone. Perfect, no one was around. So he quickly tip toes over towards Seto's room, his eyes shifting slightly before turning the nob. His glance shifted slightly inside of the room, to see that the CEO had already been asleep, yes...yet another one of his plans were going smoothly.

It only took him a few seconds to actually get to the bedside of the other, he looking down at the brunette. The fact that he slept still slightly creeped Tristan out. No one was going to possibly believe this, that's why he suddenly pulled out his camera. Making sure to take off the flash, but moments before pressing the button...something occurred to him. Camera's make a very loud annoying sound right after they take pictures. Sure it only lasts for a few seconds...but it was still a sound.

This thought caused him to quickly place the camera back into the pocket of his jacket, replacing it with his camera phone. _'Much better,'_ he thought to himself as he quickly took a few pictures. To him...these snapshots were worth more than gold, plus now he had something to rub in Tea's face. He actually had pictures of Seto sleeping and she, who had been stalking him for years, didn't have anything. Well...at least he thought she didn't have anything.

Now to complete phase two. Tristan then pulled out a CD player to place underneath the bed of the CEO. This was going to be the best prank of all. He was going to play a song so quietly that he didn't even realize it was playing...then when he woke up it'd be stuck in his head. The perfect torture. Now to figure out what song to use. The male pulled the duffle bag, which had been slung over his shoulder the entire time, off onto the floor. Quietly he zipped it open, removing his cd case, opening it to expose the cd's within. Now he needed a song that would be funny to hear the orderly brunette muttering to himself, or at least humming. And what better song to play than an extremely dirty one, one that will leave him with perverted thoughts for days to come. That's the reason he put in his Ludacris CD, and turned it "What's your Fantasy". An evil grin upon the other's face as he pressed 'repeat'.

The CD started quietly playing,_ "I wanna li li li lick you from your head to your toes...And I wanna, move from the bed, down to the, down to the to the floor...And I wanna ah, ah, you make it so good I don't wanna leave...But I got to, let let me know wh- what's your fant-tasy"_ But that was only the chorus to the song. The entire song basically consisted of him telling the woman all or his fantasies of where he had wanted to have sex. Examples such as _"On the beach with black sand, lick up your thigh then call me the pac man"_, _"You in the bath tub with the candles lit you give it up till they go out" _or even yet, _"In the white house, tryna make them turn the lights out...champagne with my campaign, let me do the damn thang." _

After the dastardly deed had been done, Tristan got up to leave the room, taking his duffle bag with him of course. Now it was off to the race, but first thing was first...he needed keys. But where on earth would Seto keep his keeps? Well since the brunette had already proven the night before that the CEO indeed talked in his sleep, he tip toed back over to the bed side. Trying his hardest not to laugh at the song that had been playing quietly.

"Hey Kaiba," he whispered, "Where do you keep the keys to your cars?"

Seto simply mumbled something before turning over, bringing his pillow closer to him...licking his lips slightly. Tristan blinked slightly at this, more scared than confused, but he couldn't let that stop him, he had a mission to complete.

"Kaiba..." he repeated as he prodded his shoulder, "Where do you keep the keys?"

"In a case," he mumbled, before lightly biting at his pillow.

'_Please be dreaming about anyone, anyone else in the world except for me,'_ Tristan pleaded in his head before asking, "And where is this case?"

"In my office."

Once that statement had been said the brunette dashed out of there, not wanting to spend another second in there. The fact that Seto was human enough to get turned on...scared him more than Tea ever having a guy who liked her...it just wasn't right. It wasn't right at all.

* * *

It took him about ten minutes to finally find the office of Seto Kaiba. He would've found it a lot faster if he didn't have to be quiet and if there weren't so many rooms. It didn't make since to the brunette why would two brothers need such a big house, it wasn't like threw parties or had people over. To him it looked as if they were just trying to rub it in the faces of others that their house was bigger than everyone else's.

"So this is Kaiba's personal office," he commented to himself as he looked around for a key to the case, "Maybe I should've stuck around to ask where that was too...but there's no way, no way at all I'm going back in his room. I mean, there's no telling what he's going to be doing next."

* * *

Moments later Tristan was back in the office, he looking very terrified, he had witnessed a very terrifying thing that day, but at the same time he looked relieved. At one point of time Kaiba told him to go away, which meant that in the dream he had been interrupting something rather than being apart of it. This made him feel a little better, only a little.

The brunette simply walked over towards the mighty desk which was placed nearest the window, he taking a seat behind it. After taking one great spin he reached down and opened one of the drawers, removing a folder. Once this folder was in his hand it was only a matter of seconds before he snatched the key which happened to be inside of it. Such joy appeared in the eyes of Tristan Taylor as he stared at the key which he held up proudly.

* * *

Never before in one night had so many plans worked, Tristan felt so happy as he sat in the seat of one of the cars which had been parked in the underground garage. As he held tightly onto the key, he couldn't help but sing lightly to himself, "No more hopin' and wishin'. I'm about to take my key 'n' Stick it in da ignition." And that's just what he did, causing the car to start up. Everything was beginning to look more clearer as he drove the car away from the house...it was he who was now in control.

Tristan had freedom, and according to Cat Woman "Freedom is Power". But then again according to Spider Man and Uncle Ben, "With great power comes great responsibility." He had never been more confused. _'So does Freedom equal Responsibility,'_ he pondered to himself, _'But what if power is freedom from responsibility.'_

_

* * *

_

During that drive, as he thought over movies he had seen, trying to figure out if what he was doing was truly the best thing...a voice started to talking to him.

"Is somebody there!" he quickly asked himself.

"Somebody?" the voice mimicked.

"Who are you?" Tristan couldn't help but ask, it was odd...but he could've sworn he had seen this conversation somewhere before.

"Don't play the innocent with **ME** - you've known all along!"

"Where are you?"

"Follow the cold shiver running down your spine..."

"But I don't have-"

"**SHUT THE HELL UP AND FOLLOW THE SHIVER!**"

So Tristan looked about in the car as he was driving, however tried his hardest to keep his eyes on the dark road at the same time. But it seemed that he couldn't think of anymore places that the person could be. " I'm right HERE!" the voice hissed from the mirror, Tristan shocked to see it was his own reflection.

"I don't understand..."

"You thought it was just coincidence - so many good things happening for you, over you, eh, Tristan?"

"No seriously, I don't understand...last time I checked I didn't have an evil spirit living inside of me."

"**THAT'S NOT THE POINT! YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE WONDERING WHAT IT IS I WANT!"**

"Okay...what do you want?"

"To do what you can't, to say what you won't - to remove those in your way..."

"But that's the thing, I do whatever I want...I say whatever I want, and no one's in my way."

"The Seto Kaiba thing...**WE** did that."

"**WE!**?"

"Remember that feeling you get when you're inside of that house?"

"Freedom..." he answered as he continued to drive, it seemed he was on auto-pilot or something to keep him from crashing.

"Bingo! Me - your greatest creation, granting you what you always wanted: power beyond your wildest dreams. There is only one who could stop us - or imagine if he should join us..."

"What Kaiba? Nah, I don't think he'd seriously try to stop me..."

"**YOU MUST GET HIM TO JOIN US! I'M YOUR NEW BOSS, TRISTAN!"**

"You can't be my boss! Nobody's my boss! I'm my own boss! I created myself!" Tristan shouted as he looked away from the mirror to continue driving. An angry expression still upon his face as he stared into the darkness of the road.

"But-"

Tristan suddenly whipped out a cross, holding it up to the mirror. **"THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPELS YOU! THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPELS YOU!"**

And with that his reflection returned to normal, the car swerving slightly at the fact that Tristan had taken his full attention off the road...however he quickly gained control of the car once more. He retreating the cross back to his pocket. The same pocket that contained his camera, camera phone...and other few knickknacks.

* * *

Aoi: Okay, maybe I had...too many parodies in that chapter. XD, who knows. This story is basically allowing me to get out all the jokes I've ever really wanted to. So if you're reading this right now...I thank you. You honestly don't know how happy you're making me right now. But seriously...review. I love to hear from you guys. It helps me get a little in touch with my readers, and lets me know that you guys aren't just taking on glance at my story then turning away. So here's me again saying...review. 


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